Jeremy Clarkson Borrowed My Blog Volume 2

Jeremy Clarkson Borrowed My Blog   Volume 2

BBC Top Gear presenter, newspaper columnist, author and jeans wearer Jeremy Clarkson has admitted he actually knows nothing at all about cars. In a frank interview with a chap called Frank from Exchange and Mart, Jeremy has revealed all ...

Author: Edward Moss

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781447509936

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Jeremy Clarkson Borrowed My Blog Volume 1

Jeremy Clarkson Borrowed My Blog   Volume 1

A strange name for a book you might say – “Jeremy Clarkson borrowed my Blog”. Well I am convinced that he did. Borrow my blog that is! Well read it. Or even come across it by accident and perhaps made use ofit for inspiration.

Author: Edward Moss

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781447506621

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Jeremy Clarkson borrowed my Blog Volume 3

Jeremy Clarkson borrowed my Blog   Volume 3

A strange name for a book you might say – “Jeremy Clarkson borrowed my Blog”. Well I am convinced that he did. Borrow my blog that is! Well read it. Or even come across it by accident and perhaps made use ofit for inspiration.

Author: Edward Moss

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781447530169

Category:

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View: 593

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The Top Gear Years

The Top Gear Years

The Top Gear Years brings together Jeremy Clarkson's collected magazine columns for the first time. Clarkson at his pithy, provocative, hilarious best We now know all about the world according to Clarkson.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780718198015

Category: Humor

Page: 512

View: 824

The Top Gear Years brings together Jeremy Clarkson's collected magazine columns for the first time. Clarkson at his pithy, provocative, hilarious best We now know all about the world according to Clarkson. In a series of bestselling books Jeremy has revealed it to be a puzzling, frustrating place where all too often the lunatics seem to be running the asylum. But in The Top Gear Years, we get something rather different. Because ten years ago, at an ex-RAF aerodrome in Surrey, Jeremy and his friends built a world that was rather more to his liking: they called it Top Gear HQ. And Top Gear is for Jeremy what the jungle is for Tarzan: the perfect place to work and play. But they didn't stop there . . . With this corner of Surrey sorted out, Jeremy and the boys decided to have a crack at the rest of the world. With Top Gear Live charging through with the subtlety of a touring heavy rock band and far flung outposts across the globe from North America to China - an empire of petrol-headed upon which the sun never set. And all along Jeremy was writing about it in Top Gear magazine. Here, collected for the first time, are the fruits of his labours: the cars, the hijinx, the pleasure and the pain. Brilliantly written and laugh out loud funny. The Top Gear Years follows Jeremy Clarkson's many bestselling titles including Round the Bend and The World according to Clarkson series. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Jeremy Clarkson is very funny and his well-honed political incorrectness is a joy. .' - Daily Telegraph Jeremy Clarkson began his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun, the Sunday Times, the Rochdale Observer, the Wolverhampton Express & Star, all of the Associated Kent Newspapers and Lincolnshire Life. Today he is the tallest person working in British television.
Categories: Humor

Clarkson on Cars

Clarkson on Cars

No one in the business is taller. In this collection of classic Clarkson, stretching back to the mid-1980s, he's pulled together the car columns and stories with which he made his name.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141916859

Category: Transportation

Page: 368

View: 857

Jeremy Clarkson gets under the bonnet in Clarkson on Cars - a collection of his motoring journalism. Jeremy Clarkson has been driving cars, writing about them and occasionally voicing his opinions on the BBC's Top Gear for twenty years. No one in the business is taller. In this collection of classic Clarkson, stretching back to the mid-1980s, he's pulled together the car columns and stories with which he made his name. As coal mines closed and house prices exploded to a soundtrack of men in make-up playing synthesizers, Jeremy was already waxing lyrical on topics as useful and diverse as: * The perils of bicycle ownership * Why Australians - not Brits - need bull bars * Why soon only geriatrics will be driving BMWs * The difficultly of deciding on the best car for your wedding * Why Jesus's dad would have owned a Nissan Bluebird * And why it is that bus lanes cause traffic jams Irreverent, damn funny and offensive to almost everyone, this is writing with its foot to the floor, the brake lines cut and the speed limit smashed to smithereens. Sit back and enjoy the ride. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Transportation

Jeremy Clarkson

Jeremy Clarkson

From causing huge disruption, to defending the rights of drivers, to fisticuffs with Piers Morgan, this is the true story of a colourful life lived at breakneck speed.

Author: Gwen Russell

Publisher: Kings Road Publishing

ISBN: 9781843586128

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 330

View: 415

Love him or loathe him, you cannot ignore him: Motoring aficionado, comic writer, TV presenter, engineering buff, journalist, author and unapologetic bon viveur, Jeremy Clarkson is one of Britain's most controversial personalities, and in this riveting and entertaining biography, frank views and hilariously candid anecdotes appear alongside the life story of the self-confessed Eurosceptic, chain-smoking petrol head. After a stint as a travelling salesman, Clarkson set up his own press agency, and soon found fame and fortune with BBC's Top Gear. Notoriously hit in the face awith a banana meringue pie on receipt of his honorary degree, he has been accused of calling cyclists 'muesli freaks' and BMW employees 'Nazis'. From causing huge disruption, to defending the rights of drivers, to fisticuffs with Piers Morgan, this is the true story of a colourful life lived at breakneck speed.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Really

Really

Because there's still plenty to get cross about, including: · Why nothing good ever came out of a meeting · Muesli's unmentionable side effects · Navigating London when every single road is being dug up at once · People who read online ...

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9781405939089

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 576

View: 245

JEREMY CLARKSON'S LATEST - AND MOST OUTRAGEOUS - TAKE ON THE WORLD CLARKSON'S BACK - AND THIS TIME HE'S PUTTING HIS FOOT DOWN From his first job as a travelling sales rep selling Paddington Bears to his latest wheeze as a gentleman farmer, Jeremy Clarkson's love of cars has just about kept him out of trouble. But in a persistently infuriating world, sometimes you have to race full-throttle at the speed-bumps. Because there's still plenty to get cross about, including: · Why nothing good ever came out of a meeting · Muesli's unmentionable side effects · Navigating London when every single road is being dug up at once · People who read online reviews of dishwashers · ****ing driverless cars Buckle up for a bumpy ride - you're holding the only book in history to require seatbelts . . . Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: Brilliant . . . Laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . Will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

What Could Possibly Go Wrong

What Could Possibly Go Wrong

What Could Possibly Go Wrong... is the sixth book in Jeremy Clarkson's bestselling The World According to Clarkson series. No one writes about cars like Jeremy Clarkson.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9781405919388

Category: Humor

Page: 512

View: 382

What Could Possibly Go Wrong... is the sixth book in Jeremy Clarkson's bestselling The World According to Clarkson series. No one writes about cars like Jeremy Clarkson. While most correspondents are too buys diving straight into BHP, MPG and MPH, Jeremy appreciates that there are more important things to life. Don't worry, we'll get to the cars. Eventually. But first we should consider: · The case for invading France · The overwhelming appeal of a nice sit-down · The inconvenience of gin and tonic · Why clothes are no better than ice cream · Spot-welding with the Duchess of Kent · And why Denmark is the best place in the world Armed only with conviction, curiosity, enthusiasm and a stout pair of trousers, Jeremy hurtles around the world - along motorway, autoroute, freeway and autobahn - in search of answers to life's puzzles and ponderings without forethought or fear for his own safety. What, you have to ask, could possibly go wrong... Praise for Clarkson: 'Brilliant... laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny... will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard Jeremy Clarkson began his career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun, theSunday Times, the Rochdale Observer, the Wolverhampton Express & Star, all of the Associated Kent Newspapers and Lincolnshire Life. Today he is the tallest person working in British television.
Categories: Humor

Round the Bend

Round the Bend

Jeremy Clarkson gets REALLY riled up in Round the Bend What's it like to drive a car that's actively trying to kill you?

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780718158422

Category: Humor

Page: 432

View: 349

Jeremy Clarkson gets REALLY riled up in Round the Bend What's it like to drive a car that's actively trying to kill you? This and many other burning questions trouble Jeremy Clarkson as he sets out to explore the world from the safety of four wheels. Avoiding the legions of power-crazed traffic wombles attempting to block highway and byway, he he: - Shows how the world of performance cars may be likened to Battersea Dogs Home - Reveals why St Moritz may be the most bonkers town in all of the world - Reminds us that Switzerland is so afraid of snow that any flakes falling on the road are immediately arrested - Argues that washing a car is a waste of time Funny, globe-trotting, irreverent and sometimes downright rude, Round the Bend is packed with curious and fascinating but otherwise hopelessly useless stories and facts about everything under the sun (and just occasionally cars). It's Jeremy Clarkson at his brilliant best. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Humor

How Hard Can It Be

How Hard Can It Be

How Hard Can it Be? is the fourth hilarious volume in Jeremy Clarkson's The World According to Clarkson series. How hard can it be... To build a power station without upsetting the eco-mentalists?

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141960258

Category: Humor

Page: 352

View: 321

How Hard Can it Be? is the fourth hilarious volume in Jeremy Clarkson's The World According to Clarkson series. How hard can it be... To build a power station without upsetting the eco-mentalists? To seek world domination if you've been hit the ugly stick? For the Met Office to get yesterday's weather right? In volume four of The World According to Clarkson, Jeremy Clarkson pours scorn on the nonsensical, the dumb, the idiotic and the plain foolish in his continuing quest to discover where exactly we've all gone wrong. Along the way he ponders: • Whether conquering France might solve the immigration problem • What happened when you ignore proper warning labels • What would happen if we turned the internet off Often controversial, frequently scathing but always funnier than James May, Jeremy Clarkson shows us how we could so easily make the world a better place. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out Number-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld, and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store. Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.
Categories: Humor

Driven to Distraction

Driven to Distraction

Jeremy Clarkson is once more Driven to Distraction. Brace yourself. Clarkson's back.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141946283

Category: Humor

Page: 480

View: 771

Jeremy Clarkson is once more Driven to Distraction. Brace yourself. Clarkson's back. And he'd like to tell you what he thinks about some of the most awe-inspiring, earth-shatteringly fast and jaw-droppingly cool cars in the world (oh, and a few irredeemable disasters...). Or he would if he could just get one or two things off his chest first. Matters such as: * The prospect of having Terry Wogan as president * Why you'll never see a woman driving a Lexus * The unforeseen consequences of inadequate birth control * Why everyone should spend a weekend with a digger Driven to Distraction is Jeremy Clarkson at full throttle. So buckle up, sit tight and enjoy the ride. You're in for a hell of a lot of laughs. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Humor

Don t Stop Me Now

Don t Stop Me Now

Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld, and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the ...

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141918327

Category: Travel

Page: 352

View: 523

Jeremy Clarkson puts the pedal to the floor in Don't Stop Me Now; a collection of his Sunday Times motoring journalism. There's more to life than cars. Jeremy Clarkson knows this. There is, after all, a whole world out there just waiting to be discovered. So, before he gets on to torque steer and active suspension, he takes time out to consider: • The madness of Galapagos tortoises • The similarities between Jeremy Paxman and AC/DC's bass guitarist • The problems and perils of being English • God's dumbest creation Then there are the cars: whether it's the poxiest little runabout or an exotic, firebreathing supercar, no one does cars like Clarkson. Unmoved by mechanics' claims and unimpressed by press junkets, he approaches anything on four wheels without fear or favour. What emerges from the ashes is rarely pretty. But always very, very funny. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out Number-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld, and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store. Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.
Categories: Travel

Motorworld

Motorworld

Jeremy Clarkson invites us to Motorworld, his take on different cultures and the cars that they drive.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141901367

Category: Transportation

Page: 224

View: 875

Jeremy Clarkson invites us to Motorworld, his take on different cultures and the cars that they drive. There are ways and means of getting about that don't involve four wheels, but in this slice of vintage Clarkson, Jeremy isn't much interested in them. Back in 1996, he took himself off to twelve countries (okay, eleven - he goes to America twice) in search of the hows, whys and wherefores of different nationalities and their relationships with cars. There were a few questions he needed answers to: * Why, for instance, is it that Italians are more interested in looking good than looking where they are going? * Why do Indians crash a lot? * How can an Arab describe himself as 'not a rich man' with four of the world's most expensive cars in his drive? * And why have the otherwise neutral Swiss declared war on the car? From Cuba to Iceland, Australia to Vietnam, Japan to Texas, Jeremy Clarkson tells us of his adventures on and off four wheels as he seeks to discover just what it is that makes our motorworld tick over. _____________ Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Transportation

I Know You Got Soul

I Know You Got Soul

In I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson writes about the machines that he believes have 'soul'. It will come as no surprise to anyone that Jeremy Clarkson loves machines.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141901374

Category: Humor

Page: 288

View: 228

In I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson writes about the machines that he believes have 'soul'. It will come as no surprise to anyone that Jeremy Clarkson loves machines. But it's not just any old bucket of blots, cogs and bearings that rings his bell. In fact, he's scoured the length and breadth of the land, plunged into the oceans and taken to the skies in search of machines with that elusive certain something. And along the way he's discovered: * The safest place to be in the event of nuclear war * Who would win if Superman, James Bond and The Terminator had a fight * The stupidest person he's ever met * What an old Cornish institution called Arthur has to do with 0898 chat lines * And how Jean Claude Van Damme might get eaten by a lion . . . In I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson tells stories of the geniuses, innovators and crackpots who put the ghost in the machine. From Brunel's SS Great Britain to the awesome Blackbird spy-plane and from the woeful - but inspiring - Graf Zeppelin to Han Solo's Millennium Falcon, they can't help but love them in return. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Humor

The World According to Clarkson

The World According to Clarkson

In The World According to Clarkson , he reveals why it is that- too much science is bad for our health 70s rock music is nothing to be ashamed of hunting foxes while drunk and waring nightsights is neither big nor clever we must work harder ...

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher:

ISBN: UCSC:32106017854644

Category: English wit and humor

Page: 245

View: 398

Jeremy Clarkson has seen rather more of the world than most. He has, as they say, been around a bit. And, as a result, he's got one or two things to tell us about how it all works - and being Jeremy Clarkson he's not about to voice them quietly, humbly and without great dollops of humour. In The World According to Clarkson , he reveals why it is that- too much science is bad for our health 70s rock music is nothing to be ashamed of hunting foxes while drunk and waring nightsights is neither big nor clever we must work harder to get rid of cricket he likes the Germans (well, sometimes) With a strong dose of common sense that is rarely, if ever, found inside the M25, Clarkson hilariously attacks the pompous, the ridiculous, the absurd and the downright idiotic ideas, people and institutions that we all have to put up with at home and abroad, whilst also celebrating the eccentric, the clever and the sheer bloody brilliant.
Categories: English wit and humor

Born to be Riled

Born to be Riled

In this collection of classic columns, first published in 1999, Jeremy takes a look at the world through his windscreen, shakes his head at what he sees - and then puts the boot in.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141901343

Category: Travel

Page: 576

View: 923

Born to be Riled is a collection of hilarious vintage journalism from Jeremy Clarkson. Jeremy Clarkson, it has to said, sometimes finds the world a maddening place. And nowhere more so than from behind the wheel of a car, where you can see any number of people acting like lunatics while in control (or not) of a ton of metal. In this collection of classic columns, first published in 1999, Jeremy takes a look at the world through his windscreen, shakes his head at what he sees - and then puts the boot in. Among other things, he explains: • Why Surrey is worse than Wales • How crossing your legs in America can lead to arrest • The reason cable TV salesmen must be punched • That divorce can be blamed on the birth of Jesus Raving politicians, pointless celebrities, ridiculous 'personalities' and the Germans all get it in the neck, together with the stupid, the daft and the ludicrous, in a tour de force of comic writing guaranteed to have Jeremy's postman wheezing under sackfuls of letters from the easily offended. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out Number-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store. Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.
Categories: Travel

And Another Thing

And Another Thing

In And Another Thing... the outspoken and outrageous presenter Jeremy Clarkson, shares his opinions on just about everything. Jeremy Clarkson finds the world such a perplexing place that he wrote a bestselling book about it.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9780141901404

Category: Humor

Page: 352

View: 906

In And Another Thing... the outspoken and outrageous presenter Jeremy Clarkson, shares his opinions on just about everything. Jeremy Clarkson finds the world such a perplexing place that he wrote a bestselling book about it. Yet, despite the appearance of The World According to Clarkson, things - amazingly - haven't improved. Not being someone to give up easily, however, he's decided to have another go. In And Another Thing... the king of the exasperated quip discovers that: • Bombing North Carolina is bad for Yorkshire • We can look forward to exploding at the age of 62 • Russians look bad in Speedos. But not as bad as we do • Wasps are the highest form of life Thigh-slappingly funny and in your face, Jeremy Clarkson bursts the pointless little bubbles of the idiots while celebrating the special, the unique and the sheer bloody brilliant... And Another Thing... is a hilarious collection of Jeremy's Sunday Times columns and the second in hisThe World According to Clarkson series which also includes The World According to Clarkson, For Crying Out Loud! and How Hard Can It Be? Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out Number-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store. Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.
Categories: Humor

As I Was Saying

As I Was Saying

As I Was Saying... is the seventh book in Jeremy Clarkson's best-selling The World According to Clarkson series. *** Crikey, the world according to Clarkson's been a funny old place of late .

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9781405924160

Category: Humor

Page: 352

View: 566

As I Was Saying... is the seventh book in Jeremy Clarkson's best-selling The World According to Clarkson series. *** Crikey, the world according to Clarkson's been a funny old place of late . . . For a while, Jeremy could be found in his normal position as the tallest man on British television but, more recently, he appears to have been usurped by a pretend elephant. But on paper the real Jeremy remains at the helm. That's as it should be. For nearly thirty years he has been fearlessly leading the charge as one the best comic writers in the country. And in 2015, he shows no sign of slowing down. So, whether it's pondering If Jesus might have been better off being born in New Zealand Why reflexive pronoun abuse is the worst thing in the world How Pam Ayres's head trumps Gordon Gecko's underpants Or what a television presenter with time on his hands gets up to Jeremy is still trying to make sense of all the big stuff. Circumstances change. Nothing's forever. But As I Was Saying provides glorious proof that Jeremy remains as funny, puzzled, excitable, outspoken, insightful and thought-provoking as ever. As if you ever doubted it . . . *** Praise for Clarkson: 'Brilliant... laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny... will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories: Humor

Can You Make This Thing Go Faster

Can You Make This Thing Go Faster

These days, you might know him better as a tractor-driving Gentleman Farmer, but Jeremy Clarkson wasn't always a horny-handed son of the soil.

Author: Jeremy Clarkson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 1405946512

Category:

Page: 464

View: 523

The hilarious new collection of stories and observations from Jeremy Clarkson - setting our off-kilter world to rights with thigh-slapping wit once again These days, you might know him better as a tractor-driving Gentleman Farmer, but Jeremy Clarkson wasn't always a horny-handed son of the soil. Not at all . . . Back in the day Jeremy was far more likely to be found gunning around the world in a haze of burnt rubber and petrol fumes. But life as a globe-trotting petrol-head also meant he was forced endure more than his fair share of foolishness, frustration and downright bafflement. And, while Jeremy may not a patient man, you have to ask why anyone should have to consider issues as diverse and perplexing as: ·The downsides of relaxing in a bath of crude oil ·Why fishing is for people who hate their kids ·Whether there are noise-cancelling headphones with the power to silence James May ·Why saving the planet means soggy paper straws and no more children ·What to do about the rambler who stole his marrow But as puzzling and exasperating as life on the road often seemed to be, you could always count on Jeremy to set the world to rights with a rare wit and unique understanding. And at full throttle. Just don't expect it to all go smoothly . . . Praise for Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Categories:

Get in the Sea

Get in the Sea

3 Jeremy Clarkson Jeremy Clarkson is for men who reckon they 'tell it like it is' but in fact repeatedly tell it like it isn't and like it must never be allowed to be ever again. Jeremy Clarkson is for men who are weirdly proud of their ...

Author: Andy Dawson

Publisher: Penguin UK

ISBN: 9781405925532

Category: Humor

Page: 256

View: 418

The Sea - cold, wet, and unforgiving. The perfect place to dump shit products, moronic people, and crap pop culture. Man buns? Get in the sea. Glitter beards? In you go. Cereal cafes? SEA. And how about manspreading, ant gin, water sommeliers, real people playing Quidditch, dating apps, Bluetooth gloves, and Shoreditch? Then there's waterproof suits, juicing, early Christmas, dog yoga, Nando's, drones, and Gregg Wallace? Fuck. It's never ending. Something must be done. Buy this book. Or you know what you can do. . .
Categories: Humor