Not Exactly Love

Not Exactly Love

A Memoir Betty Hafner. cathartic power of letting go.” —Lynn Fairweather, MSW, Author of Stop Signs: Recognizing, Avoiding, and Escaping Abusive Relationships NO t Exactly Love Not Exactly Love a memoir Betty.

Author: Betty Hafner

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631521508

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 240

View: 146

It was 1969, and all the rules were changing, when Betty, a woefully single French teacher on Long Island, met the handsome but edgy new teacher at her school, a hippie just back from Woodstock. His vitality opened up a new world to her—but when they married, his rages turned against her, and often ended with physical violence. Like millions of women who discover they’ve married an abusive man, Betty was forced to make daily decisions—to suppress her feelings or risk confrontation, to keep it secret or report, and ultimately, to live with it or leave. Part memoir, part warm-hearted look at the ’70s, and part therapeutic journey, Not Exactly Love: A Memoir is an intense and inspirational story of a woman who grew from her experience.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Baffled by Love

Baffled by Love

Secrets in Big Sky Country: A Memoir by Mandy Smith. $16.95, 978-1-63152-814-9. A bold and unvarnished memoir about the shattering consequences of familial sexual abuse—and the strength it takes to overcome them. Not Exactly Love: A ...

Author: Laurie Kahn

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631522277

Category: Psychology

Page: 280

View: 905

For three decades, Laurie Kahn has treated clients who were abused as children—people who were injured by someone whom they believed to be trustworthy, someone who professed to love them. Their abusers—a father, stepfather, priest, coach, babysitter, aunt, neighbor—often were people who inhabited their daily lives. Love is why they come to therapy. Love is what they want, and love is what they say is not going well for them. Kahn, too, had to learn to navigate a wilderness in order to find the “good” kind of love after a rocky childhood. In Baffled by Love, she includes strands from her own story, along with those of her clients, creating a narrative full of resonance, meaning, and shared humanity.
Categories: Psychology

Lost in the Reflecting Pool

Lost in the Reflecting Pool

—Betty Hafner, author of Not Exactly Love: A Memoir “The emotional journey that is Lost in the Reflecting Pool is a story of love and of life, of courage and endurance, made all the more real and relevant by Dr. Pomerantz's human ...

Author: Diane Pomerantz

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631522697

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 336

View: 264

Award-Winning Memoir 2017 Readers’ Favorite When Diane, a psychologist, falls in love with Charles, a charming and brilliant psychiatrist, there is laughter and flowers—and also darkness. After moving through infertility treatments and the trials of the adoption process as a united front, the couple is ultimately successful in creating a family. As time goes on, however, Charles becomes increasingly critical and controlling, and Diane begins to feel barraged and battered. When she is diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, Charles is initially there for her, but his attentiveness quickly vanishes and is replaced by withdrawal, anger, and unfathomable sadism. What Diane previously thought were just Charles' controlling ways are replaced by clear pathologic narcissism and emotional abuse that turns venomous at the very hour of her greatest need. A memoir and a psychological love story that is at times tender and at times horrifying, Lost in the Reflecting Pool is a chronicle of one woman's struggle to survive within—and ultimately break free of—a relationship with a man incapable of caring about anyone beyond himself.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Uprooted

Uprooted

Memoir Esti Skloot ... A soul-searching memoir detailing the painful, but ultimately liberating, disintegration of a twenty-five-year marriage. Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-1-63152-149-2.

Author: Esti Skloot

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631526657

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 272

View: 886

When pregnant Esther—a young, adventurous, British-born Israeli—follows her new husband, Steve, to America, she has no idea what she’s getting herself into. Even before their baby is born, Esther discovers the dark side of her charming film production manager husband, and learns that she must cope with his moodiness and domineering personality. Left alone day after day in a high-rise apartment in Queens, Esther struggles with culture shock, homesickness, and adapting her husband’s whims—like the baby goat he brings home to their eighth-floor apartment to keep as a pet. Ten years and two more children later, thirty-four-year-old Steve is diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. Despite aggressive treatments, he succumbs to the disease, leaving Esther to care for their three children alone, Esther at first feels lost and bewildered; as time goes on, however, she discovers that there is a freedom in her new situation—and that she has a greater inner strength than she ever before realized.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Out of the Bronx

Out of the Bronx

$16.95, 978-1-938314-742. After staying in an abusive marriage for twenty-five years, Gwen Plano finally broke free—and started down the long road toward healing. Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-163152-149-2.

Author: Irene Sardanis

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631525407

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 256

View: 592

Irene Sardanis was born into a Greek family in the Bronx in the 1940s in which fear and peril hovered. Her mother had come to New York for an arranged marriage. Her father drank, gambled, and enjoyed other women—and then, when Irene was eleven, abandoned her family altogether. Faced with their mother’s violent outbursts in the wake of this betrayal, Irene’s older siblings found a way out, but Irene was trapped, hostage to her mother’s rage and despair. When she finally escaped her mother as a young adult, she married a neighbor, also Greek, who controlled and dominated her just like her mother always had. But Irene wasn’t ready to let her story end there. With therapy, she eventually found the courage to leave her husband and pursue her own dreams. Out of the Bronx is her story of coming to terms with the mother and past that terrified and paralyzed her for far too long—and of how she went on to create a new life free of those fears.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

The Buddha at My Table

The Buddha at My Table

Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-1-63152-149-2. At twenty-five Betty Hafner thought she'd found the man to make her dream of a family and cozy home come true—but after they married, his rages turned the dream into ...

Author: Tammy Letherer

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631524264

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page:

View: 586

Can you come sit at the table? Tammy Letherer’s husband of twelve years spoke these words on a Tuesday night, just before Christmas, after he had put their three children in bed. He had a piece of paper and two fingers of scotch in front of him. As he read from the list in his hand, his next words would shatter her world and destroy every assumption she'd ever made about love, friendship, and faithfulness. In The Buddha at My Table, Letherer describes―in honest, sometimes painful detail―the dismantling of a marriage that encompasses the ordinary and the surreal, including the night she finds a silent, smiling Thai monk sitting at the same dining room table. It’s this unexpected visitation, this personification of peace, that sticks with her as she listens to her husband reveal hurtful, shocking things―that he never loved her, he doesn’t believe in monogamy, and he wants to “wrap things up” with her in four weeks―and allows her to find the blessing in her husband’s betrayal. Ultimately, it’s when she realizes that she is participating in her life, not at its mercy, that she discovers the path to freedom.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Notes After Midnight

Notes After Midnight

Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-163152-149-2. At twenty-five Betty Hafner, thought she'd found the man to make her dream of a family and cozy home come true—but after they married, his rages turned the dream into ...

Author: Carol Richmond

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631526329

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 208

View: 598

When thirty-five-year-old Carol Richmond decides to end her seventeen-year marriage, she has no idea what’s in store. Within the first year of the divorce, her ex-husband abandons his children and ignores the court’s orders to pay child support, and despite working sixteen hours a day and seven days a week, Richmond cannot make ends meet. She is forced to sell her home and hawk her jewelry in order to keep her family fed and housed, and more often than not she relies on hired women to kiss her children goodnight and dry their tears. In the decade to follow, Carol’s growing children struggle with individual complexities. One son attempts suicide; another utterly fails academically; and her daughter is sexually abused by a trusted acquaintance. Yet Carol and her children endure—because they must. Haunting yet full of humor and self-effacing wisdom, Notes After Midnight is a story of the invisible binding thread connecting each of us to one another—the thread that helps us find our way along even the most difficult of paths.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Shunned

Shunned

A haunting, lyrical memoir about a dysfunctional family's experiences in a reality far from the envisioned Eden—and the terrible cost of keeping secrets. Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-163152-149-2.

Author: Linda A. Curtis

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631523298

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 320

View: 458

Linda Curtis was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness and is an unquestioning true believer who has knocked on doors from the time she was nine years old. Like other Witnesses, she has been discouraged from pursuing a career, higher education, or even voting, and her friendships are limited to the Witness community. Then one day, at age thirty-three, she knocks on a door—and a coworker she deeply respects answers the door. To their mutual consternation she launches into her usual spiel, but this time, for the first time ever, the message sounds hollow. In the months that follow, Curtis tries hard to overcome the doubts that spring from that doorstep encounter, knowing they could upend her “safe” existence. But ultimately, unable to reconcile her incredulity, she leaves her religion and divorces her Witness husband—a choice for which she is shunned by the entire community, including all members of her immediate family. Shunned follows Linda as she steps into a world she was taught to fear and discovers what is possible when we stay true to our hearts, even when it means disappointing those we love.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography

Split Level

Split Level

—Betty Hafner, author of Not Exactly Love: A Memoir “In a story dotted with Pyrex, Fresca, and dial phones, Sande Boritz Berger sets the stage for a page-turning journey through 1970s suburbia. An unsuspecting trip to 'Marriage Mountain ...

Author: Sande Boritz Berger

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631525568

Category: Fiction

Page: 320

View: 668

In Split-Level, set as the nation recoils from Nixon, Alex Pearl is about to commit the first major transgression of her life. But why shouldn’t she remain an officially contented, soon-to-turn-thirty wife? She’s got a lovely home in an upscale Jersey suburb, two precocious daughters, and a charming husband, Donny. But Alex can no longer deny she craves more—some infusion of passion into the cul-de-sac world she inhabits. After she receives a phone call from her babysitter’s mother reporting that Donny took the teen for a midnight ride, promising he’d teach her how to drive, Alex insists they attend Marriage Mountain, the quintessential 1970s “healing couples sanctuary.” Donny accedes—but soon becomes obsessed with the manifesto A Different Proposition and its vision of how multiple couples can live together in spouse-swapping bliss. At first Alex scoffs, but soon she gives Donny much more than he bargained for. After he targets the perfect couple to collude in his fantasy, Alex discovers her desire for love escalating to new heights—along with a willingness to risk everything. Split-Level evokes a pivotal moment in the story of American matrimony, a time when it seemed as if an open marriage might open hearts as well.
Categories: Fiction

Manifesting Me

Manifesting Me

Not Exactly Love: A Memoir by Betty Hafner. $16.95, 978-163152-149-2. At twenty-five Betty Hafner, thought she'd found the man to make her dream of a family and cozy home come true—but after they married, his rages turned the dream into ...

Author: Leah E. Reinhart

Publisher: She Writes Press

ISBN: 9781631523847

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 216

View: 204

When Leah Reinhart was six years old, her family moved to an unlikely neighborhood on a hill much like the country—a place where everyone dressed and lived like they were living a real-life Little House on the Prairie. Yet their new home was in Oakland, California, and everything surrounding Leah’s neighborhood was the polar opposite of their old-fashioned lifestyle. As an already scared little white girl in a predominantly African American city, Leah quickly learned that would have to face many of her fears—or get eaten alive. And in her search for love and belonging, she also found that things aren’t always as they appear. As she got to know her neighbors, most of whom belonged to the neighborhood church, she began to realize that the hood was sometimes much safer than the country. Over the course of her life—learning from the streets, a cult, trial and error, and many years of therapy—Leah developed an eye for patterns. She learned how the belief system she’d absorbed during her childhood manifested in her teenage years and young adulthood. Ultimately, she learned how to change her thoughts and accept herself—and in doing so, she broke free of the cycle she’d been imprisoned by.
Categories: Biography & Autobiography